Lost in Translation
Where: Church.
When: Saturday @ approximately 2pm EST
What: Sermon
Why: Memorial service for a gentleman. Words like “gentleman” should be earned, not dished as freebies. This man, judging from the consistency of accolades, deserves it. May his soul rest in eternal peace.
Mood: Sombre but punctuated by occasional kwotable translation gaffes …
Disclaimer: From here on, this is not JM @ work. The pastor has taken over my blog. Oh, and the reader is advised to be liberal with the use of “r” and “l” that is, you may intershange them at will …
P will be pastor.
T will be translator.
P: Mwathani agocwo
T: Praise the Rod!!
Congregation: (largely ignores but one or 2 squeaky voices …): Ameniiiiiiiiii ….
P: Bwana asifiwe (not convinced, switching lingua …)
T: Praise the Lond!!
Crowd ignores again …
P: (visibly agitated): Caitani niagucitie ngoro cianyu naagacioha …
T: The devil has pulled your hearts …. (processing info ...) and tied them …
P: Korwo ni Kibaki wi haha auge “Harambee” … (confusing Emilio with Jomo K)
K: If Kibaki was here and said “Harambee” …
P: Onawe cucu nowanirire uge “Harambee”
T: Even the grandmothers in here would have responded …
P: I like preaching in my favarite ranguage – Kiswahili
T: (Translates into necessary Kisapere …)
P: Because then the “hory split “ and I interact propery …
T: Nyendete kuhunjia na githweri … (missing part of translation)
THEME REVEALED …
P: Indo ciothe ni cia Ngai
T: All things berong to God …
P: Ugi wothe, wara wothe, ni wa Ngai
T: All the Knowredge, arr the wisdom comes fron Gond
P: Nimuramenya uria murathimetwo? Nginya muriaga thabibu tare githeri?
T: You have been very blessed by the almighty …
(clearly 4getting what thabibus are …)
(You have been blessed, you partake of grapes/raisins like they are murram/githeri) …..
TBC …
To be continued ….
posted by jm at 9:13 PM
8 Comments:
Hehehe, I find translators for sermons very interesting since most of the congregation ussually understand both languages.
ha the good rond gond almighty
i shall not comment on my feeling about said pastors but i tell u good entertainers they are
RORRRR kikuyu 101 for me :-)
nice
JM? Who are you? And what have you done with Mwangi? Guys, Mwas has been kidnapped. Let's form a committee to look into how to form a task force armed with the task of finding our Mwas!
ERO O ERO @ "ha the good rond gond almighty"
na mwas akapita kati kati yao na akapotea...last seen wearing...
when the sermon is boring the translators ain't. translators remind me of those movie commentators, mnajua wale wa movie za ocha? "basi otero pale..."
Oh rordy rordy...need to stop reading your blog in public! lmao! riterarry
ROFLMBAO...ASHINDWE!!!
This reminds me...had a conversation with a dear friend other day and found out "True of God" is a direct translation...I've oft wondered why ppl said that...
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